WE’VE COME A long way since the days of Dream Matte Mousse and crimpers.

 Yes, while today’s teens seem to have been enrolled in some sort of MUA academy as soon as they could walk, we on the other hand went through the compulsory phase of making that shit up as we went along.

With that came our fair share of mistakes and questionable methods that I shudder just thinking about now.

There were quite a few makeup habits that were simply part of my routine for a number of years, habits that would shock the contour out of a baby MUA now. 

While I can’t quite remember where I learned most of these ‘tricks’, I like to think I wasn’t the only one that implemented them into my looks.

So, while reminding myself this is a safe space, here are five things I used to do with my makeup that I’m embarrassed to admit. 

1. Get handsy 

Not a fecking brush in sight, I applied pretty much every single makeup product with the makeup tools the Gods gave me -my grubby hands.

I’m talking foundation, concealer and even blush, they all got lathered on with my fingers leaving me with a far-from-flawless finish.

‘How did you apply powder products with your hands?’ I hear you ask, well, I’m happy to share that I used to mix my powder blush and bronzer with some Vaseline to make my own cream products.

Sounds real cute and Pinterest-friendly, in reality it looked shite and made for a right mess.

We all had to start somewhere, right? 

2. Bye bye brows

As I was lathering on my full coverage foundation with my hands, I would drag that product right across my rather bushy brows and play a game of ‘Find Orlaith’s Brows’.

Yep, way before I grew too fond of my tweezers and learned what an arch was, I just used to avoid the worry altogether by removing the eyebrows from my face with foundation.

Time Hop reminds me of these dark days every one and a while and it’s enough to make me wince. 

3. Eyeshadow everywhere

We won’t even talk about the colours I used to favour but instead that I used to use them to cover every last square inch of my eyelid.

From eyelash to eyebrow, there wasn’t a millimeter of skin that didn’t enjoy the benefit of a bit of colour. Before makeup tutorials changed my makeup routine forever, I just presumed that eyeshadow meant your eyes were completely ‘shadowed. 

And just to make that really pop, I’d layer on as much black kohl eyeliner that would fit in my waterline.

Gorge.

4. Gloss over concealer

As well as wanting my eyebrows to disappear, I was keen to make the lower half of my face as one-dimensional as possible.

Enter those concealer sticks that looked convincingly like lipstick. Yep, I used those as lipstick, as did many of my friends.

They were thick and often uncomfortable on the lips so in a misguided attempt to make my lips a little smoother, I would layer on my favourite Miss Sporty lip gloss at the time and actually leave the house looking like that.

5. Lock that look down

After creating a serious lewk, I wanted to make sure it would last until the next day, which is probably the first time I’d take a makeup wipe to my face (I paid for this skin torture in the years after).

At the time, makeup setting spray wasn’t on my radar - if it even existed - so there was just one product that could do the job; hairspray.

Yep, before I’d leave the gaff I’d give my face a good hose of hairspray to really lock the shit down.

I know, I KNOW, it’s so gross. But it did work.

The day I finally got my hands on a bottle of Urban Decay setting spray was a life-changing day indeed.

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